U-G-L-Y...Pliers is looking for an Alibi

After the stinkbomb I put up last week, let us move onto greener pastures with a slew of good looking lines for the NCAA week ahead. I need to wash the stink of last week off of me worse than Jim Carrey had to wash the trannyness off of him in Ace Ventura. I feel dirty.

Onto the picks...god help us all.

Last Week - 2-6
YDT - 5-11

Georgia Tech getting (yes GETTNG) 5.5 at MIAMI. Sure, I fell in love with the Miami defense two weeks ago against The Bowden Boys. Then, Bowden almost lost to JACKSONVILLE STATE. What a shocker that would have been. Too bad, really. Anyway, Georgia Tech's defense is stout as usual, and their offense too a great change of pace for a bunch of stupid thugs to try to adapt to. Miami's secondary will snuff out much of the Ga Tech attack, but Miami won't score many points either, and their home crowd is roughly as ambivalent as a Gopher crowd in the Metrodome. Ga Tech 17, Miami 14.



VA TECH by 4 vs Nebraska. No comment. Va Tech 24, Nebraska 14.



The OVER at 56.5 on the OREGON ST/Cincy game. Tony Pike is good for what, 4 touchdowns? Add a few by Jacquizz Rogers and the typical Beaver putn return for TD and we have an OVER! Cincy 42, Oregon St 28.



BYU by 7 vs Florida St. Do you think that the Mormon Priests will shudder a little bit when the Seminoles get off of their plane in Utah? BYU is a pretty tough football team, playing at home, in the mountains, against a team traveling 3 timezones that almost donked a game to Jacksonville St. Sure, the Seminoles are staring an 0-3 start directly in the face, but BYU has national title aspirations and always seem ready to play. I like BYU in this one. BIG. Glenn Beck will be so happy he might not even pit any acrid misinformation after the big win. BYU 42, Florida State 14.

UCLA by 11.5 vs Kansas St. Ugghhh...Kansas State is horrible. There are more talented teams playing on the island of Manhattan than there are in the city of Manhattan, KS. UCLA might not be elite, but you don't have to be to beat K-State by 2 TDs. UCLA 38, K-State 10.

Georgia by 1.5 at AR-Kansas. Got I hate Petrino. I really, really do. I just can't bet on his teams, which is probably why I have a 20% win rate this year. But I don't give a shit. That guy is less reputable than a Snake Oil salesman on Coney Island. Eff him. Georgia 28, Ar-Kansas 14.

FLORIDA by 28 vs Tennessee. Urban Meyer is not going to call off the dogs (as if he ever does anyway), and Lane "Shoot First" Kiffin does not have the players to compete. Hell, I'm not even sure if the last team Layne coached has the talent to beat Florida. Gators 59, Vols 21.

Wyoming getting 7 at COLORADO. The wheels of the Dan Hawkins bus have officially fallen off, bounced down the mountain, and splashed into the watery remnants of the melted glacier at the bottom. Wyoming hung in there with Texas last week until a guy named Colt showed the Cowboys why they aren't in the Big-12. Colorado doesn't belong there, either. Wyoming 31, Colorado 14.